I am a petty, petty child. From now on I vow to not complain about childish things. I am entering into the stages of adulthood, I leave to be on my own in August. There is not more time for moaning and whining.
Speaking of college, I get my roommate assigned to me next week. I am very excited and oh so nervous. I pray that we will not clash and shortly will become best friends because, in all honestly, I really don't have a best friend right now. Whoa, almost going whiney and childish there.
I am scared to move away from my parents and sister. I am afraid to live on my own, make my own desicious, and be responsible for my own actions. What if I'm not smart enough for my classes? What if I do things I will regret? What if I don't make friends? What if I'm not happy with who I am? I try so hard to be like other people. To be more outspoken, to be smarter, more observant, more aggressive. But should I be? I mimic other people and that is a problem. I don't want to blend it with other people and be the same as them. I want to be me. The thing is, I have done this for so long, I don't know what 'me' is. This is not a poor me rant. I am merely stating a fact.
The one good thing that is keeping me sane through this wirlwind of uncertainty is making plans. Non school related plans. Such as coming home for Halloween to go to a Park City cemetary with my family where they tell stories about the inhavitants of the graves. These things are keeping me calm.
By the way, Happy Birthday to Harry Potter and J.K. Rowling.
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