Now that my brain is about to explode from the dramatics and foolish nonsense I always somehow dabble in, I thought Why not blog? So here I sit on my bed, a frigid breeze lazily sweeping in from my window and all the lights off while I listen to the Marie Antoinette soundtrack. It brings back memories of simpler times and I miss them. I miss laughing loudly over silly things. I miss making jokes. I miss smiling. I miss the content I once felt. I miss the peace.
But there is not sense in wishing and dreaming. A dream is a wish the heart makes and unfortunately my heart has been broken for a time. I know, I am a drama queen, but I have to let it out somehow and what better and more harmless way then channel it through blogging?
Region drama is Thursday. In three days. I don't exactly feel prepared but I don't want to go on to state so I guess that isn't a bad thing. I just am nervous to spend the entire day by myself (?) reciting a monologue I completely believe in, but have a hard time showing emotionally. It's not that I don't feel emotional over it. I do, especially as of late. But I can't seem to show it with my eyes. Oh yeah, that is because I keep my eyes down the entire time. Hmm...I wonder who enforced that.
I hope tomorrow is better. I am always nervous and anxious and my heart is always pounding but I don't know how to fix this. I have made a big mess when I should have stayed out of it. I only have myself to blame.
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